As the late Biggie said.. “To all the ladies in the place with style and grace”… (I’ll stop at that line, the next isn’t as appropriate.) Lets own being the strong girls and women of the world. Lets teach the younger ones a greater feeling of worth aside from social media. Let’s own our confidence with style and grace. We don’t need to present a false sense of self from what we see on our phones covered in filters. If it makes you confident to cover up, do that. If you like rocking less clothes, own it. Don’t do it from the place of seeking attention or more social likes and thumbs up. Let your identity be created in reality not on what social media has guided you towards!

Here’s my favorite one if I could teach any female one thing…. Enjoy your own company!!!!!! I worked in restaurants/bars for years, so I’ve seen loads of people and personalities. You generally tend to see more men sitting at bars enjoying their time and own company. When I would see a woman alone I would think to myself… What’s wrong with her? Why is she alone? Does she not have friends? Where’s her man? How could she go out alone?

These women were foreign to me and not the norm of society… but, when I started doing it myself, I got it! I loved it! I would people watch, read books, work, and chat with strangers. I enjoyed every solo outing and took something away from each one. I would meet the coolest people and have the best conversations. The best solo outings were on out of town adventures or flying alone. I love an airport in my own solitude. I think everyone should adventure flying alone at some point, man, woman and young adults. Go out alone. Grab a coffee with yourself. Eat lunch with a book at an outdoor place. Eaves drop and people watch. Don’t forget sunglasses (hiding your observations of your surroundings) and tip your servers! Encourage young ladies to be able to be alone, enjoy their own company, collect their own thoughts and be comfortable with themselves!

“To the honeys gettin’ money, playin’ fellas like dummies..” – Notorious B.I.G. More Biggie lyric/quotes. Now, you don’t have to play the fellas, but don’t let yourself be played either. I’m no he man woman hater, I love the dudes, they just already have this alone thing figured out! Stand up for what you believe. Stand your ground. Don’t compromise who you are. There are amazing men out there that will support you and your dreams alongside theirs, not in place of each other’s. Find a job, career or hobby that you love, something that makes you happy. It doesn’t have to be your full time money maker and if it is, bonus! If what you love is to put on a fresh face, style a fabulous outfit with your most perfect accessories. Do just that! If it makes you happy even if it’s going to grab groceries, you’re not hurting anyone. If you see another female rocking her yoga clothes (knowing she didn’t do yoga), applaud her too. If you’re going out with friends, DO NOT ask what they are wearing. Wear what makes you look and feel good and comfortable in your own skin.

Maintain your sense of self with style and grace! Embrace your train wreck days/weeks and years! Learn to have your own autonomy! When I learned the meaning of that word and saw women around me that had it figured out, I realized only I could stop me from enjoying myself!